Monday, August 2, 2010

Werewolf 'Eclipsing' the Vampire?

“Let’s face it, I am hotter than you are”

How hard must it have been for Taylor Lautner to say this to Robert Pattinson with a straight face?

Yes, that is exactly the kind of movie ‘Eclipse’ is. Teeny bopper, immature, brimming with sexual tension, cudding-is-okay-but-sex-is-not kind of movie. But am I complaining? Hell, no! Neither are the other “Twihards” (a.k.a. fans of the Twilight series) across the globe, I presume.

Okay, so maybe that’s going too far. I wouldn’t go to the extent of calling myself a “Twihard”, but I did enjoy the books. They’re silly and that’s exactly why they're so much fun. They take you back to the time when love meant butterflies in the stomach every time you spotted the object of your desire, stolen glances in the classroom and stolen kisses in the corridors. There are enough 30-40 year old fans of the movie, and I suspect this is the reason why. Also one of the main protagonists - Edward. That kind of boyfriend/husband/partner doesn’t exist. Now, at any rate.

I've always rooted for Edward but after watching 'Eclipse', I’m with Jacob all the way! And I have a feeling that Melissa Rosenberg - the scriptwriter of the movie - may have had a big role to play in this.

Now, the debate over the comparative hotness of the two males done with, let’s come to the movie. I liked the movie (gasp!).

The last two movies were real letdowns. For one, Edward has been portrayed as this gorgeous, sex-on-toast vampire in the books. He was made to sound so delicious, you couldn't wait for the hotness to drip down the screen. However, in the movies Robert Pattinson is made to look way too pale. The fact that he is a fairly bad actor didn't help matters.

Secondly, 'Twilight' & 'New Moon' were badly directed. 'Eclipse' on the other hand is reasonably well directed and fairly engaging.

The movie is bursting with sexual tension down to the last frame. It’s a lust triangle between two gorgeous men - one “cold” & the other "burning hot" - and on top of the triangle sits Bella, the morose, confused, spineless female protagonist of the novel who, apparently, loves Jacob but loves Edward more. can she not love Jacob more???

1) He's pining for her & she knows it!

2) He risks his life to protect her, knowing fully well that she’ll choose Edward over him eventually (though he keeps hoping otherwise till the end!)

3) He saves her from freezing to death in an ice storm and the one kiss he shares with her towards the end of the movie is WAY more sensuous than all the kisses she has shared with Edward, combined.

4) His shirtless body can put any Calvin Klein underwear model to shame and he doesn't like wearing his shirt too much. See for yourself...

5) Unlike her boyfriend (Edward), he doesn’t reject her sexual desire, he welcomes it!! Stupid stupid woman.

6) He tells her that being with him would be as easy for her as breathing. B/c he’s the closest she’s got to human, in Forks. B/c he’s warm, not cold as marble all the time. But she’s not interested in breathing…or even being alive. She wants to have the life sucked out of her by a vampire so she could become cold & clammy too.

There are enough scenes in the movie that make you want Bella & Jacob to end up together. Like the garage scene where Bella asks Jacob if he’s imprinted yet (you feel for him, man), the scene where he tells her he loves her, the scene where he carries her into the forest (twice), the scene where he wraps himself around her to keep her warm, and finally, the kiss!!

The theater was packed during a non-peak hour show, that's the 'Twilight' craze. Though there were way more men in the theater than there should’ve been. I think they were dragged there by their gigling, squealing girlfriends. I genuinely felt bad for those men. Ladies, get a life! Go watch 'Breaking Dawn 1 & 2' with your girlfriends. It'll be much more fun and you won't have to listen to drivel about how dumb and tortuous the movie was, later.


Moonshine said...

Hahahaha I watched with a "girl friend".. was deifnitely more fun therefore!!!!

I am all for Jacob!!!Edward is a twit.

Scarlett said...

@Moonshine - I wouldn't call him a 'twit' as such. He's a dreamboat of a guy, if you ignore the 'cold as a marble' bit. But yeah, 'Eclipse' makes you fall in love with Jacob.

Moonshine said...

He doesnt talk his age.. actually he is 300 yrs old or something come to think of it!!!! He is too much of goody 2 shoes!!!

Scarlett said...

@Moonshine - He's 117 years old but he became a vampire when he was 17, remember? So he's kind of stuck there :) He's just mature!

eye-in-sty-in said...

they shd juat have a 3 some and be done with it.... both look kinda g@y and maybe the experiment could give bella her spine back... ;-)

eye-in-sty-in said...

this is for the follow up comments...