Boy: You’re smelling of strawberries.
Me: Raspberry. And it’s Body Shop. And it costs a bomb so you better not trash it.
Boy: I don’t care. I don’t like fruity moisturizers. Why would anyone want to smell like a fruit?
Me: Well then, I guess I know what we’re doing tonight.
Boy: No wait! I didn’t say I couldn’t make exceptions! Isn’t raspberry, like, an exotic fruit? I can make an exception for an exotic fruit!
Later on the same night…
Boy: You need to go back to the gym!
Me: Errr…shouldn’t you, like a good friend who cares for my mental & emotional well-being, be encouraging me to be comfortable in my own body?
Boy: Like a good friend, I’m supposed to be encouraging you to lose weight.
Me: (Damn!) Ummm, don’t you love having more of me to love?
Boy: There’s way too much of you to love. I don’t need so much.
(Double damn…The reverse psychology thing was really not working!)
But after some time, The Boy felt bad…
Boy: Well, you don’t have to be thin thin. You can be plum.
Me: It’s not ‘plum’ silly, it’s ‘plumP’
Boy: What??!! I thought it was ‘plum’!
Me: Plum is a fruit!! You know, like plum cake, plum custard….?
Boy: Oh…but you like fruit
Me: I like smelling of fruits, I don’t want to BE one!
Boy: Hmmm…is plum an exotic fruit too?
Me: No it’s not. Go to sleep now. G’nite
Tell you what, boys WILL always remain boys :)