Merry Christmas!!!!

So, appalled at the lack of enthusiasm around our favorite festival, we tried to force some Christmas cheer into life. Took out our little Christmas tree and decorated it with ornaments. Went to Flury's and picked up a couple of plum cakes (thanks to the mother who warned there better be plum cakes in the house when she comes visiting for Christmas-New Year's!)

I think it's going to be a quiet Christmas with mum. We'll probably go out for lunch, watch a movie, have cake & hot chocolate...that kinda stuff. And I don't mind, actually.

Gasp! I'm getting old. That's what it is!

Though there is the little person inside me jumpin' 'n' dancin' around 'coz it's X-Mas. And as long as I have that enthusiasm in my heart for this time of the year, I needn't be scared about losing my love for Christmas. Or getting old for that matter!

Merry Christmas all you guys! Eat, drink, make merry, party...OR...chill at home, watch unending re-runs of 'Friends', watch your favorite Christmas movie, make love...do whatever works for you. Just make sure to have a jolly good time!

It's Diwali Week!

This week (Diwali week) is one of my favorite weeks of the year, the other being the week leading up to Christmas. I love Diwali, really do. Just like Christmas engulfs one with warmth, Diwali brings me happiness - the uncomparable happiness of being with family. That the entire city is lit up and homes are aglow with candles/diyas only adds to the festivities.

This year though, I won't be with family over Diwali :( I'll be on my lonesome onesome, but that hasn't stopped me from lighting up my house. Yes, the lights are up in my house! They make the ambience so festive. And in the spirit of the festival, I've decided that I'll try to wear saris to work as many days as I can this week. It's very unlike me, I know, but the fact is that I really do need to get comfortable in a sari and the festivities around are giving me a good reason to wear them!

Seriously though, I see women gliding in saris all around me. They wear it so gracefully and carry it with such ease, you'd think they were born wearing it. I, on the other hand, cannot wear it for eight hours without getting murderous thoughts in my mind. Saris are annoying. First of all, there's so much cloth around you. I'm not used to so much cloth. Secondly, it's loose everywhere so you're constantly fretting about whether it's ballooning and making you look like a butterball or coming out from different sides. And third, it's so bloody difficult to climb in & out of a car wearing a sari. I somehow manage to clamber in and tumble out.

Saris may not be fun but Diwalis definitely are. So if I don't see you lovely people before Diwali on this space, you have yourselves a very Happy Diwali and a big truckload of happiness :)

Avatar and on to Christmas with Family

The reason I’m not doing a full-fledged post on Avatar is because I didn’t like it. It was painfully long, boring, and the last 45 minutes or so were very Bollywoodish – one man taking on & defeating an entire army of villains, a miniscule clan armed with bows & arrows taking on the might of a humungous army with the most sophisticated weapons at its disposal & winning, and all that. I feel the movie is way over-hyped, and if rumors that James Cameron spent ten years making this movie are true, then well, I think those ten years were a waste for a good part. Because the special effects were all that the movie had to offer, to me at least.

Christmas was spent with family. It was a last minute decision to travel home, and I’m so glad I did. It had been more than a year since I last visited my parents (though they kept visiting me every 2-3 months, individually if not always together) and this trip made me feel terrible about being such an inattentive daughter to my parents. The three days that I was home, their entire lives revolved around me. Feeding me to the gills with all my favorite food (so what’s new with Indian moms?), making sure my every need was taken care of without me having to move an inch, making sure I was warm and my throat protected at all times, given that the temperature dipped to 6-7 degrees at night & hovered around 15-16 degrees at mid-day and my throat being exceptionally vulnerable to the cold.

Sometimes, it’s only when you spend time with your parents that you realize how much you mean to them, that they’re possibly the only people in the whole world who love you unconditionally and without expectations of being loved the same amount in return, how it’s always OK that you couldn’t do something that they’d requested you to do for them, and how even a short periodic visit by you can light up their lives. Parents really are mind-blowing people and mine never get their due from me, I know, because of the sheer fact that I must live in a different city than them. They want me to be back for Holi and I’m already scouting for tickets.

In the meantime, thanks Mum for the amazing gajar ka halwa (made with full cream milk, condensed milk, ghee, cashews & raisins :) and the plum cake. And thanks Dad for taking the trouble to dress up, complete with a blazer, to come pick me up from the airport.

Happy Diwali

Be safe, be happy, light some diyas...and have a wonderful Diwali.

Durga Puja

Today is Mahashtmi, the eighth & most important day of Durga Pujo, the biggest festival for Bengalis. Durga Puja is to Calcutta what Diwali is to Bombay & Delhi, except this city believes in coming out on the streets in full force to celebrate!

It's not even funny how crazy the streets are the four days of Pujo. I, for one, can't fathom where all these people live! The roads become one way, even for walking. You can't walk down the street without sweaty arms brushing past yours, sweating buckets yourself, people pushing & shoving you and stepping on your shoes from behind (if you're wearing slip-on shoes).

No one cares for the crowds or the humidity, so strong is the love of Bengalis for their beloved Goddess. There are hordes of people out on the streets till 3-4am, pandal-hopping (phrase used by Bongs for visiting various pandals) and eating at the numerous food stalls set up near the pandals. Jaundice, typhoid, swine-flu...Are those street food? :)

By this time, the shopping is over - 'notun jama' (new clothes) for each day of the pujo, gifts for family & friends have been purchased. Some kids even manage to get their parents to buy 2-3 sets of clothes for each day!! The Bong's love for Durga Pujo is unbridled. Sample this, we have five days off work (Thursday-Monday) for Pujo, and no work happened for the one week leading upto the Pujo holidays as people were out shopping for gifts for their friends & family and clothes for themselves.

I'm not a religious person at all. I don't visit temples, don't believe in deities or idol-worship. But Durga Puja is one festival which pulls me in (I love Diwali & Christmas too, but they aren't focused so much on a deity as Durga Puja is). Maybe it's the festivities....lights, decked up streets, the euphoria, happy people all around, celebrating with food & fun without a care in the world....or maybe it's the idol of Durga which, trust me, can bring tears to your eyes. The sheer power - or 'shakti' - emanating from the idols (mindblowingly talented artisans, I tell you, I wish they got their due) is something you have to experience in Calcutta. The realization that the world always thinks of females as the weaker sex, yet they are worshipping a female God for her 'shakti' WILL bring tears to your eyes.

And oh yeah, the sound of the 'dhak' - the most beautiful "religious" sound in the world. Right up there with the Nasik dhol.

Happy Pujo everyone, especially the Bengalis - resident and probashi - reading this.

Can We Have One New Year Pliss?

Today is the Bengali New Year. The number of New Years we have in this country is truly amusing. There are as many New Years as the number of communities!

Malayalis have their own new year - Vishu. Tamils have theirs - Puthandu. Andhraites have theirs too - Ugadi. Maharashtrians have Gudi Padwa, Punjus/Sikhs have Vaisakhi etc. Every community celebrates their new year on different dates. I wonder how they decided which date to celebrate it on!!

I grew up in Bihar. I don't think Biharis fall into any ethnic community per se. Neither do UPites. We consider ourselves to be part of the 'North Indian' species. The "cow people" if you will (no offence meant to anyone, UP & Bihar ARE known as the "cow belt" of India).

I also don't think we have any festivals intrinsic to our community, the Bihari community that is. Though I must admit that I don't count myself as part of the Bihari community for the simple reason that I belong to a very non-Bihari family, and my upbringing has been very different from that of kids in typical Bihari families.

So even if there are any festivals celebrated only among Biharis, I would've seen them being celebrated in other people's homes only. Don't know if that is a good or a bad thing. Honestly, I couldn't care less. My idea of Diwali is lighting candles around my house while in my parents' house a Lakshmi-Ganesh Puja is a must on Diwali. My Holis are spent locked inside my house & Durga Pujas are spent as far from my parents' house as possible, since their house becomes a 'vegetarians only' zone for the ten days of Durga Puja. Heck, they don't even use onions & garlic for those ten days!! To be fair to them, I must admit that they were not like this before. They have become this way due to certain incidents that have happened to them.

To me, all of this is pointless really. I don't believe following all these traditions...or visiting a temple on a particular day every week...or fasting on certain days of the week/month is going to improve the quality of our life in any way....or make us more successful or rich or healthier..or make us live longer. We'll only get those things in life that we have worked towards. Our success / failure is a result of the choices we make, the decisions we take in life. How long we end up living will be a result of our genetic make-up, the environment & our lifestyle choices. We will be healthy if we give importance to our physical, mental & emotional health and take care of ourselves. No miracles / short-cuts here!

Of course, there is such a thing as destiny. I believe in it too. But destiny always presents us with a situation where we have at least two choices, and the course of our life depends on which way we decide to go.

Anyway, coming back to the point...I feel deprived of my "ethnic" New Year! No traditional New Year = No money from elders! No one gives you money on 1st January :(

But thank God for the English calender. It makes life so much simpler to know when exactly it's time to celebrate!! :D

The Thing About Holi Is....

I haven’t been too fond of Holi since 12-13 years of age. That’s when I got totally turned off Holi & stopped playing it. Part of it was b/c the wet colors we used to play with just wouldn’t come out. I remember scrubbing myself to death with Rin (yes, Rin!!!!!) as I’d have school the next day, and would still end up showing up at school colored pink!!!

The other part was b/c I had a horrible Holi experience the year before I stopped playing, which I’ll spare you of. Let me just say that the part of India I grew up in believes in ‘dirty’ Holi. In fact, the dirtier the better (and no, I’m not considering having raw eggs thrown at you as ‘dirty’).

Even now I don’t understand why people like playing with wet colors. Dry colors, or gulal / abeer, as they’re known are so much better. They don’t stay on your skin or your clothes. You can still show up at work the next day looking like a normal human being than someone who’s been dyed pink!

I had an argument with a friend of mine over this last night. A bunch of friends played Holi in the morning. No, I didn’t go & thank God for that….they smashed raw eggs on each other’s heads! There’s nothing even remotely tempting about that for me.

So….this one friend had a presentation today & he requested the others not to put wet color on him. BUT….as we all know, that doesn’t really happen, so the guy has had to turn up for the presentation in all his ‘pink’ glory!

This other friend of mine kept insisting that work can’t control one’s life & what he does on a day off is strictly his business. His boss/clients have no say in it. I thought this was exaggerating it way too much. This isn’t about work dictating one’s life, it’s just about being responsible & professional.

I mean, SHOULD you show up at a client presentation colored pink when you’re the one presenting? And if do, do you really expect the clients to take you seriously?

I would definitely have a little 'discussion' with my reportee if he/she turns up for a client presentation with Holi colors still on. What about you?

Of Peace, Hope & Faith

I am one of those people who're hopelessly in love with Christmas. Don't ask me why? There is no specific reason why Christmas warms my heart more than any Indian festival, it just does. The irony is that inspite of having gone to a Catholic school for 15 years of my life, I wasn't so crazy about Christmas then as I became after school. It's probably the memories of celebrating Christmas during my college years in the US that made the festival so endearing.

This is what our Christmas celebrations in college used to be like : The city would start getting decorated mid-November, as people started their holiday shopping. Malls, airports, streets, restaurants, hotels all would have giant Christmas trees and be decked up with lights. Every store you walked in would have Christmas carols playing in the background & Santa smiling indulgently at you. We used to play Secret Santa every Christmas, where all of us friends would write out names on small chits of paper, put them all into a box & everyone would draw one name each. The deal was that you had to get a gift within $5 for the person whose name you drew, without the person knowing it's you who's getting them a gift! The day before college shut down for Christmas, we would all meet in one of our rooms & would one by one give gifts to the person whose name we pulled out. The next day we would all be headed 'home', wherever that was (My Christmas used to be spent either in Chicago or New York, where I had family). The fun part of this game wasn't only the exchange of gifts but also those 10 days leading upto it when each person had to keep a secret & figure out something that the other person would like & appreciate.

Now, my Christmas celebrations start mid-December & last till the end of January. I decorate my home & my work station with Christmas stuff. Like every year, this year too I got this GORGEOUS Christmas tree that already has some beautiful decorations on it, and with a little bit more it will truly light up my living room. I also got a beautiful wreath for my door & a Santa to put beside the tree!

My mother, who loves Christmas almost as much as I do & is a great sport in life, will be with me this Christmas, and the two of us have drawn up some great plans to celebrate the day, which include an English Christmas lunch followed by a movie (preferably a Christmas movie - my all-time favorite is 'Love Actually'). In the evening we're calling a couple of my friends over for plum pudding & hot apple cider.

I look forward to Christmas every year but this year I'm particularly eager for it to come around. I was thinking why and you know what I came up with? We're living in times of such fear, insecurity, despair & hatred. Most of us are scared to go to a mall, movie theater or other crowded public places. Our society is becoming more & more fragmented by the day. There is so much hatred towards people belonging to other religions, so much regionalism, so much distrust towards one another. Everything, including life itself, seems so transient, and I have a bad feeling that things will only get worse with each passing year - at least for a few years UNTIL we take care of the menace of terrorism (globally) and divisionary politics (within India) once & for all.
Come to think of it, this is such a sad way to live life. Living in fear is no way to live. It is simply counting down to death because our aim then is to make it through each day.

I refuse to live in fear. I want to live believing there is still a lot goodness in this world, that is much stronger than evil. I want to believe there is still a lot of love within all of us that is much deeper than the hatred in the entire world put together. I want to believe. This Christmas I'm going to say a prayer for peace, for hope, for faith and for humanity.

All Christmassy on the Scarlett Front

I am happy. Make that very happy. No, ecstatic actually. Why?

Because it's almost Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In case you can't tell from the pictures on my blogs, the 'Jingle Bells' carol right below this post & the countless exclamation marks above....I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's my favoritestest festival of the entire year! I like Diwali too but Diwali is more about being with family etc. Whereas Christmas is all about warmth & joy, and Christmas decorations are much prettier than decorations for any other festival. Take malls for example. They are so prettily decorated around Christmas!! Actually, I love everything about Christmas...the decorations, the plum cake, the midnight mass. The very mention of Christmas generates visions of warmth, fireplaces & apple ciders in my head. Not to mention winter & snow!

Sigh...I really do love Christmas.

So let's all be happy & celebrate Christmas. Like the Delhiites say - MERI CHRISTMAS, TERI BHI CHRISTMAS!!! :D

This one's for Moonshine, a Delhiite to the core who shares my love for Christmas. Guess where it's from, Moonshine!!

It's That Time of the Year

*Title borrowed from Moonsine (this is what I thought her latest post was about :)

Now that I've ensured she can't sue me, let's get on with it :-)

Dashing through the snow

In a one horse open sleigh

Over the fields we go

Laughing all the way

Bells on bob tails ring

Making spirits bright

What fun it is to laugh and sing

A sleighing song tonight

Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one horse open sleigh

Jingle bells, jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one horse open sleigh

A day or two ago

I thought I'd take a ride

And soon Miss Fanny Bright

Was seated by my side

The horse was lean and lank

Misfortune seemed his lot

We got into a drifted bank

And then we got upshot

Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one horse open sleigh
Jingle bells, jingle bells

Jingle all the way

Oh, what fun it is to ride

In a one horse open sleigh

Happy Diwali!!!!!

So finally, it seems I’m on my way home for Diwali.

Actually, I shouldn’t really call Patna ‘home’ b/c I’ve been away from the place for soooooooo long (more than ten years now!) that I feel disconnected from the place. In fact, I used to feel more at home in Bombay & would yearn to get back as soon as I could whenever I used to travel. Except when I was going to Delhi where I have friends, friends & more friends that I have an absolute blast with!! What keeps me going back to Patna, apart from the fact that my parents live there, is the thought of being taken care of & chilling out for a few days without having a zillion things to do, places to be at etc.

Anyway, coming back to the context of this post….I had planned to take a train from Calcutta to Patna & fly on my wayback. Unfortunately, two days before my departure (tonight) students in Bihar went on a rampage to protest the violence against North Indians perpetrated by Raj Thackerey & his release from jail. For some inexplicable reason, they started burning trains en route to Patna, so all trains to & from Patna were cancelled over the past two days. Thankfully, just in time for my trip home, the trains have resumed.

The thought of not being able to make it back home for Diwali had depressed me a bit. Festivals are the times when I miss family the most. Not that we have extravagant celebrations on Diwali (the Hum Aapke Hain Kaun kinds….God, they were so over-the-top & fake!!), but I like to be with my family on the occasion. We light diyas/candles, cook good food & just generally meander about the house. Everyone around you is with family during Diwali & is so happy that it sucks if you’re not happy too!

Coming to the issue of Raj Thackerey, I cannot believe the man has caused such unrest in the country (yes, it’s not limited to Maharashtra alone anymore) and still keeps getting let-off from prison!! What I want to ask is: who gave him the right to take law in his hands & go around beating people up? Why is he such a hypocrite? Like there are no Maharashtrians living & working outside Maharashtra & outside India? Take Gujrat & Madhya Pradesh for example. These two states share their borders with Maharashtra & are teeming with Maharashtraisn. Going by his logic, they too are snatching away employment opportunities from locals & should be beaten up & sent back to Maharashtra!! How would he react then??

For one, I have always taken exception to the ‘Jai Maharashtra’ slogan that politicians & celebrities keep chanting at rallies & award functions. Since when has Maharashtra – or any state for that matter – has become bigger & more important than India? No wonder that it’s been 60+ years since independence & we’re still walking on crutches on our way to development. Development cannot and will not take place till we leave our narrow-mindedness behind and stop letting ‘self-proclaimed’ leaders divide us on the basis of ethnic lines.

Why is the government not able to keep him behind bars for good? Are they even interested? How can one individual get so much bigger than the law and the principles of democracy & freedom that this entire country is founded upon?? Even Mumbaikars are scared to go to out on the streets thinking of the rioting MNS supporters. Since when has it become acceptable that one man can cripple an entire city by fear, holding millions of people to ransom?

Hopefully, things will be better after Diwali. Not that I expect some miracle to happen…but we could all surely use some lovin’.

Happy Diwali everyone

Puja Hangover

The Pujas are finally over. A pall of gloom has descended over Calcutta as people have just finished bidding adieu to their favorite Goddess and pandals are being razed to the ground ruthlessly. No wonder the craftsmen who erected the pandals choose to stay away while they're being demolished.

This was my first Durga Puja in Calcutta. When people told me Pujo in Calcutta is crazy, I did not quite know what they meant. Now I do.

The past one week has been a whirlwind of activity. Hanging out till 4 in the morning every single day, sleepless mornings thanks to the 'dhaak' (drum) that is beaten at pandals during aarti, gallivanting in the sun all day, messed up meal times, gorging on street food etc. have left me with a strained foot, an upset stomach and temperature from all that over-exertion. Phew!!

Having spent 5 years in Mumbai, I can’t help but compare Durga Puja with Ganpati. They are drastically different. In Mumbai, there is only one section of society that is enthusiastic about Ganpati. The rest limit themselves to darshan. Durga Puja however, is the favorite festival of Bengalis. It is to Bongs what Diwali is to Mumbai. The festival is preceded by one month of shopping for family, friends & relatives. People must have at least 5 new outfits, one for every day of the Pujo. They spend lavishly & they love to eat! They just don’t tire of it!! People swarm the street like ants & you just can't understand where they came from!!

Hopefully, I’ll be able to recover over the weekend. Y’all have a good weekend!!

The Face of Durga at Maddox Square Park

Will give you goose bumps if you are there.....

The Festival of Calcutta

I am not the most religious person you will meet but when religious festivals are celebrated with such fervor as Durga Puja in Calcutta and Ganpati in Bombay, I cannot help but get swept in the tide.

Durga Puja has begun in Calcutta. One of the many joyful things it has brought with itself is one whole week of holidays from work!! How can one not love a festival that can compel even cold-blooded capitalist companies to submit to its stature?

There are pandals (tent-like structures inside which Goddess Durga’s idols are placed) or pujas all over the city. The idols are beautiful and awe-inspiring to say the least. The entire city is lit, not only areas where there are pujas. The big pujas are surrounded by food and games stalls. The big parks in the city also have rides such as the giant wheel, the pirate ship etc. that not only the kids but even the adults enjoy. The malls and theatres are empty, instead everyone is out revelling on the streets, irrespective of which community and social strata they belong to. It’s clean fun…no rowdy men throwing colors at you or groping you.

Durga Puja in Calcutta is all about food and people roaming the streets all dressed up and having fun. Hopefully I’ll be able to post some pics of Durga idols. So until the next post, Happy Pujo everyone!!

Never Too Early to Sing the Carols

There’s still 115 days to go to Christmas. So what? It’s never too early to get excited about Christmas!!

Christmas has a very warm, fuzzy feeling associated with it. It’s about happiness. It’s about celebrations. It’s about love and being with the people you love the most. It’s about forgiving people. It’s about patching up with people you’ve had differences with. It’s about The Holidays!

Maybe it’s my years spent in the US, where everyone looks forward to Christmas as much as Indians look forward to the monsoons every year after parched summer months, which is responsible for my love for Christmas. The malls, airports, streets, restaurants are all decked up with Christmas decorations. There are Christmas carols being played inside every store. Coffee shops serve seasonal creations such as Eggnog Latte, Apple Ciders & Christmas/Holiday blend of coffee. There is a Santa Claus in every mall handing out gifts and candy. Families hang out together, while friends hug & kiss each other. The only emotions to be seen around are love and happiness. The icing on the cake? If it snows!!

What can be prettier than a white Christmas?

I love putting up a small Christmas tree in a corner of my house and decorating it with ornaments & lights. I love having friends over on Christmas eve, playing carols, having a traditional Christmas dinner and exchanging gifts. But what I love the most about Christmas is that unlike Hindu festivals that are all about noise, pollution, inconveniencing others and creating public nuisance, Christmas is celebrated the way it should be – quietly within our own homes, surrounded by happiness and amidst the people we love.

How is it possible to not love a festival as beautiful as Christmas?

Festival of lights

Diwali is right around the corner but the excitement isn't palpable like it is every year. I've been trying to get myself in the festive mood by dressing up to work in bright traditional wear for the past two days, but it's difficult to get excited about something when people around you aren't.

There are no decorations on the streets, no bright colored kandeels (paper lanterns) hanging from the windows of peoples' homes, and no celebrations. People are working like it's the busiest time of year (whereas the opposite is true of the Diwali season). They're walking around the streets like there's no reason to rejoice. The happiness and bonhomie that generally accompany Diwali is completely missing! All I see around is indifferent faces.

I wonder what the reason for this is? Is it that we are getting so pulled down by the ever-growing demands of our lives that we have no time to even feel happy? Is living in this big bustling metropolis of ours that we lovingly call aamchi Mumbai actually draining us of all energy and joy?

Many people do not celebrate Diwali because they wish not to burn crackers. But crackers isn't all there is to Diwali! Isn't Diwali also about lighting up our homes, spending time with the people we love, celebrating the good things we have in our lives & being grateful for them, and spreading warmth & happiness? In fact, I believe Diwali is mainly about these things and more!
We don't need crackers to feel happy.

I hope we don't let the spirit of Diwali die. I hope we don't let happiness leave us for good...because there is no other way to live than to be happy. Happy Diwali!!