(Title inspired by 'Love in the Times of Cholera' by Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
A was trying to instill better financial discipline in Scarlett. In the middle of the conversation Scarlett starts crying & here’s the conversation that ensued:
A: Why are you crying?????
Scarlett: (Sobbing) You have no idea how long it’s been since I’ve gone shopping or bought something nice for myself!
A: How long?
Scarlett: (Screaming through sobs) Six months!!
A: (With raised eyebrow) Really?
Scarlett: (Completely hysterical) What do you mean ‘really’? It’s been six months! I haven’t bought any clothes or shoes or bags for myself! I’ve only bought a pair of flip flops, that too for 250 bucs!
A: Why haven’t you bought anything?
Scarlett: Because most of my money goes in paying my fat-ass landlord and my student loan and my stupid maid and milk man and newspaper guy and cable guy and my electricity bill and telephone bill and my goddamn investments! It seems I earn just so I can pay people!!!!! And if I go shopping all the time I will not have any savings!
A: (Cautiously) You can go shopping some times.
Scarlett: (Wailing) No I can’t! I can’t!
A: But why?
Scarlett: (Screaming) I just told you why! Don't you understand English?
A: I do! But why are you crying?????
Scarlett: I haven’t been shopping in six months!!!
A: Don’t cry! I’ll take you shopping this weekend. We’ll shop all weekend. You can buy whatever you want. Clothes, bags, shoes…whatever! Just please don’t cry!
Scarlett: (Crying even louder) It’s not about shopping!
A: (Confounded) It isn’t?
A: Then what is it about?
Scarlett: I never seem to have enough money to buy all the things that I want to, in spite of working so hard.
A: So it IS about shopping!
Scarlett: No it’s not! Why can’t you understand!
A: OK…whatever. OK let’s make a plan….but stop crying first…Jesus Christ!
A: OK, here’s the plan…I’ll take you shopping every month & you can buy whatever you want to. But don’t cry!
A: (Hyperventilating, doesn't know what to do) Oh God..Oh God..Oh God…Why are you crying?????